Nonmen Jokes

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BeardFisher-King

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« on: May 04, 2017, 04:53:29 pm »
How do you defeat a Nonman in a swordfight? Before it begins, you ask him, "Hey, that looks like an excellent sword. Who made it for you?". Then run him through as he pauses in confusion.
"The heart of any other, because it has a will, would remain forever mysterious."

-from "Snow Falling On Cedars", by David Guterson

BeardFisher-King

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« Reply #1 on: May 04, 2017, 04:55:59 pm »
How do you defeat a Nonman in a swordfight? Before it begins, you ask him, "Hey, you look really familiar to me. Have we met before?". Then run him through as he pauses in confusion.
"The heart of any other, because it has a will, would remain forever mysterious."

-from "Snow Falling On Cedars", by David Guterson

Redeagl

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« Reply #2 on: May 04, 2017, 04:57:11 pm »
You posted that joke 4 times now, BFK :P
I think the effect you arr trying to achieve is acting that you forgot that you posted it then posting it again?  in that case, you are a genius, BK.
“The thoughts of all men arise from the darkness. If you are the movement of your soul, and the cause of that movement precedes you, then how could you ever call your thoughts your own? How could you be anything other than a slave to the darkness that comes before?”

- Chronicler of the Chroniclers

Redeagl

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« Reply #3 on: May 04, 2017, 04:57:42 pm »
You posted that joke 5 times now, BFK :P
I think the effect you arr trying to achieve is acting that you forgot that you posted it then posting it again?  in that case, you are a genius, BK.
“The thoughts of all men arise from the darkness. If you are the movement of your soul, and the cause of that movement precedes you, then how could you ever call your thoughts your own? How could you be anything other than a slave to the darkness that comes before?”

- Chronicler of the Chroniclers

BeardFisher-King

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« Reply #4 on: May 04, 2017, 07:02:02 pm »
Well, what happened is that Madness deleted the second joke, thinking that it was a duplicate post. Once the second joke was deleted, your comment no longer made sense in the original thread. So I started a new thread, "Nonmen Jokes", to preserve the comedic flow interrupted by the dastardly Madness.
« Last Edit: May 04, 2017, 10:32:04 pm by Beardfisher King »
"The heart of any other, because it has a will, would remain forever mysterious."

-from "Snow Falling On Cedars", by David Guterson

TaoHorror

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« Reply #5 on: May 04, 2017, 08:09:11 pm »
What does a Non-man do when you tell him to go fuck his mother?
It's me, Dave, open up, I've got the stuff

MSJ

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« Reply #6 on: May 04, 2017, 08:17:35 pm »
What does a Non-man do when you tell him to go fuck his mother?

Find someone memorable...
“No. I am your end. Before your eyes I will put your seed to the knife. I will quarter your carcass and feed it to the dogs. Your bones I will grind to dust and cast to the winds. I will strike down those who speak your name or the name of your fathers, until ‘Yursalka’ becomes as meaningless as infant babble. I will blot you out, hunt down your every trace! The track of your life has come to me,

BeardFisher-King

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« Reply #7 on: May 04, 2017, 10:29:24 pm »
Tao....my man! Keep swingin'!
"The heart of any other, because it has a will, would remain forever mysterious."

-from "Snow Falling On Cedars", by David Guterson

Redeagl

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« Reply #8 on: May 06, 2017, 10:54:35 pm »
What does a Non-man do when you tell him to go fuck his mother?
The Nonman tells you that he isn't Ikurei Xerius.
“The thoughts of all men arise from the darkness. If you are the movement of your soul, and the cause of that movement precedes you, then how could you ever call your thoughts your own? How could you be anything other than a slave to the darkness that comes before?”

- Chronicler of the Chroniclers

TaoHorror

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« Reply #9 on: May 07, 2017, 02:12:35 am »
MSJ and Red - both good answers, I didn't know, hence why I "asked"  ;)

Let's see, any more balls I can swing at here ... Why did the Non-man cross the road? I can't remember ... ta-da, da

Or maybe better as He couldn't remember why?
« Last Edit: May 07, 2017, 02:14:50 am by TaoHorror »
It's me, Dave, open up, I've got the stuff

BeardFisher-King

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« Reply #10 on: May 08, 2017, 01:02:02 pm »
This joke was originally posted on the Eärwan Jokes thread. Imho, it's just too good to languish in obscurity on that thread, so......

A cop on the beat happens upon a Nonman beating the utter crap out of some guy. The cop shouts, "Hey, what the hell you doing beating the crap outta that guy?" The Nonman stops, turns to the cop and says, "Sorry, officer, but I'm just trying to remember where I parked my car."
"The heart of any other, because it has a will, would remain forever mysterious."

-from "Snow Falling On Cedars", by David Guterson

TaoHorror

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« Reply #11 on: May 08, 2017, 04:23:44 pm »
This joke was originally posted on the Eärwan Jokes thread. Imho, it's just too good to languish in obscurity on that thread, so......

A cop on the beat happens upon a Nonman beating the utter crap out of some guy. The cop shouts, "Hey, what the hell you doing beating the crap outta that guy?" The Nonman stops, turns to the cop and says, "Sorry, officer, but I'm just trying to remember where I parked my car."

Hee, hee - nice!
It's me, Dave, open up, I've got the stuff