Metaphysics as Two Cows?

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sciborg2

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« on: January 14, 2020, 12:00:10 am »
Idealism: You have two cow thoughts. Who needs milk? That's more than enough.

Panpsychism: You have two cows made up of thousands of cow particles. How this works, nobody knows.

Materialism: There are no cows, no milk, no you. Just atoms in the Void.

Dualism: You have two cows. You make a bunch of hamburgers, and now you have two infinitely precious cow souls which is way better than actual cows.

Creationism: Those cow fossils were put in the ground by Satan. Also, in the Garden of Eden cows gave out strawberry and chocolate milk.

Nondualism: By milking the cows, you are milking yourself....Stop snickering and get those filthy thoughts out of the One Mind!

Mysterianism: I think you have two cows, but I'm too lazy to check.


TaoHorror

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« Reply #1 on: January 14, 2020, 02:50:07 pm »
Idealism: You have two cow thoughts. Who needs milk? That's more than enough.

Panpsychism: You have two cows made up of thousands of cow particles. How this works, nobody knows.

Materialism: There are no cows, no milk, no you. Just atoms in the Void.

Dualism: You have two cows. You make a bunch of hamburgers, and now you have two infinitely precious cow souls which is way better than actual cows.

Creationism: Those cow fossils were put in the ground by Satan. Also, in the Garden of Eden cows gave out strawberry and chocolate milk.

Nondualism: By milking the cows, you are milking yourself....Stop snickering and get those filthy thoughts out of the One Mind!

Mysterianism: I think you have two cows, but I'm too lazy to check.

Ha, this is great! I finally understand all this now ( I think ). Hee hee!
May your death be soon, slow and painful

sciborg2

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« Reply #2 on: January 14, 2020, 09:49:56 pm »
Glad you like them Tao, I wish I could do ones more specific to certain philosophers but I figure that's the job of someone like H who's put in the hard work of understanding these philosophical types.

TaoHorror

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« Reply #3 on: January 14, 2020, 11:07:12 pm »
Glad you like them Tao, I wish I could do ones more specific to certain philosophers but I figure that's the job of someone like H who's put in the hard work of understanding these philosophical types.

Don't sell yourself short! We're all expecting big things ... ( hee, hee! ). Well, if you feel the urge and add more, you have at least one person here who would enjoy them  :) :) :)
May your death be soon, slow and painful

TaoHorror

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« Reply #4 on: January 14, 2020, 11:08:08 pm »
The Creationism one is classic  ;D ;D ;D
May your death be soon, slow and painful